’24’ + The Bible / ComiCon = Stephen Baldwin’s ‘The Remnant’

Consider this my last Stephen Baldwin post here on Suburbarazzi. (Hey, I heard that collective sigh!)

Comicon, as you may have heard, is THE place to promote any and every sci-fi or action project in the works. Either that or it’s a very clever plot by Gillian Anderson to round up all world’s uber-geeks and dissapear them in plume of purple smoke.

Until that happens, though, movies like the “Star Trek” reboot, the upcoming “Watchmen” comic-book-turned-blockbuster, TV shows like “Heroes” and “Lost,” and even the “Dr. Horrible” webisodes will continue getting the red carpet treatment. Add to that list one Stephen Baldwin, who has co-created a new comic book series, dubbed “The Remnant.”

For your consideration:  A supernatural thriller cartoon in the vein of “24,” with religious undertones.

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Baldwin, who has a home in Upper Grandview, summed it up this way to CBR (Comic Book Resources, to those of you not in the know):

tjndc5-5kyuk8xml1t13dyofm9h_layout.jpg“I wanted to do a comic that asked the big questions but answered them in little ways. Philosophy and spirituality are complex beasts, but I believe literature’s purpose is to contextualize these tricky subjects into entertaining stories that speak, not preach, to the reader.”

Baldwin teamed up with the creator of the TV series “Eureka,” Andrew Cosby, as well as Caleb Monroe, Julian Totino Tedesco, and Paul Azaceta to create the new series.

Now, if only we could convince them to do an reboot of that Illustrated Children’s Bible, with Jack Bauer periodically showing up to interrogate the apostles. That I’d pay to see.

(AP Photo/Eric Jamison)

A vote for Obama is a vote for Stephen Baldwin to move to Canada

Still not sure whether to cast your vote for Obama or McCain this fall? Well, if you’re part of Upper Grandview actor Stephen Baldwin’s flock, the GOP supporter (who supported Mike Huckabee in the primaries) would like you to know he’s throwing all of his evangelical endorsement power behind John McCain.

But that’s not all. He’s also vowed, in an interview with Fox News, to move to Canada if Barack Obama is elected.

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Consider that reason No. 2,304 to vote for the Illinois Senator.

Of course, it’s worth noting that another Baldwin bro, Alec, made the same kind of bizarre threat back in 2000, vowing to head north if George W. Bush won the election. And unless “30 Rock” is filmed in Vancouver, I’m pretty sure he didn’t stick to his guns.

Also, Stephen crossed his fingers while making the pledge and joked “let the media have fun with that,” so he likely wasn’t serious. Still, the prospect of an ex-pat Stephen Baldwin in Canada does actually make a little more sense. I hear acting gigs are far easier to come by in Vancouver these days.

“Celebrities who threatened to move out of the U.S. when Bush got elected” [LA Times]

Stephen Baldwin feels the love at the White House, gets a tongue lashing from brother Billy

After dealing with the highs and lows of “The Celebrity Apprentice,” it seems that Stephen Baldwin, cncs_08_0428_mh_0126.jpgeveryone’s favorite Upper Grandview evangelical, can handle whatever curve balls the good Lord throws his way. And in the last day, he got a couple. First, he was invited by his friends at the White House down to D.C. to help celebrate National Volunteer Week.

Baldwin was selected to be a kind of “cultural advisor” to the Bush administration over a year ago (I kid you not), and he joined singer Michael W. Smith and other members of the President’s Council on Service and Civic Participation, USA Freedom Corps, Boys & Girls Club of Greater Washington, and the Corporation for National and Community Service for the festivities. Among other things, the event promoted the creation of a new online toolkit designed to help get kids involved in volunteering.

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But not everyone is such a big fan of Stevie B’s activism. Chief among his recent critics: brother Billy Baldwin (a former Bedford resident), who has been especially critical of the younger Baldwin’s anti-gay stance. In a recent interview with Out magazine (via AHN), Billy lashed out. The quotes are after the break …

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Great moments in Baldwin-brother spoof shows

Upset that we won’t get any new episodes of “Dirty Sexy Money” — and Billy Baldwin’s prescient, spot-on Eliot Spitzer impression — until 2010? Or September at the very earliest? Well, my friends, it is possible to get your Baldwin fix at the local multiplex right now.

Billy (who lives in Bedford) has a small part in “Forgetting Sarah Marshall,” starring in the show-within-a-show, the mock “CSI” series “Crime Scene.” I’ve never seen somebody lampoon David Caruso quite so perfectly … except, of course, David Caruso himself in “Jade.”

The best part of the whole “Crime Scene” setup — NBC actually created a website for the faux show: nbc.com/Crime_Scene/

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All this got me to thinking: Which Baldwin brother does spoof TV (or film) the best? Remember “Cleaver”? Or, more recently, “The Celebrity Apprentice”?

And the nominees, along with video clips and a poll, are after the break.

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Vera Wang to hawk Serta mattresses on ‘Celebrity Apprentice’; Stephen Baldwin to quit in protest

Having Vince McMahon as a guest judge on “Celebrity Apprentice,” that’s just good plain common sense. But dress designer Vera Wang? vera-wang.jpgWhy the Pound Ridge resident would want to appear on The Donald’s program, much less to use the NBC airtime to talk up a line of Serta mattresses, is beyond me. Have the Kohl’s sweatshops driven her completely off the deep end?

Also on tap for this Thursday’s “CA” episode: Upper Grandview’s Stephen Baldwin is going to ask to resign. No, not because of any longstanding grudge with Wang, but rather thanks to his stewing grudge with fellow contestant Piers Morgan. It takes me back to the good ol’ days of “Celebrity Mole” and Corbin Bernsen, the last person to bring out Baldwin’s true born-again bitchiness. Ah, good times.

(AP Photo/Richard Drew)

Stephen Baldwin inducted into ‘Stupid Bitches Club’

In case it wasn’t already clear from last night’s episode of “Celebrity Apprentice” — baldwin-apprentice.jpgduring which Upper Grandview’s Stephen Baldwin taunted Piers Morgan with bizarre retorts (“boomerang … boom … remember that … boom”) — now the youngest Baldwin has officially been named to the “Stupid Bitches Club.”

The honor comes from GaySocialites.com (I get these things from Google News alerts, I swear), which also cited his anti-gay marriage position, support for Mike Huckabee, and the film “Threesome” as further evidence of Baldwin’s bitchiness. I would have listed his role as Barney Rubble, from “The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas.” But that’s just me.

(NBC Photo: Justin Stephens)

Quote of the Day: Alec Baldwin on ‘Celebrity Apprentice’

Watch the clip here.

Be sure to wait for it, wait for it. About halfway through the video is a gem of a quote from Alec Baldwin on his brother — the one who lives in Upper Grandview: “There’s no one more full of crap than Stephen.”

The only thing that that would have been better than that is if he’d done it in the “30 Rock” voice of upstairs neighbor Mrs. Rodriguez.

With or without impressions, though, it’s still great television.

Alec Baldwin to the ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ rescue

The competition is getting so fierce on “Celebrity Apprentice” that Stephen Baldwin is apparently going to be calling in some favors from brother Alec Baldwin. alec-baldwin.jpgAnd here I thought Corbin Bernsen on “Celebrity Mole” was just about the stiffest competition he’d ever face. But he ain’t got nuthin on Gene Simmons and clearly Stephen, that rude little Upper Grandview pig, is as much of a marked man as ever.

The episode featuring Alec is set to air this Thursday, Jan. 19, at 9 p.m. DY-NO-MITE!

“Alec Baldwin and Jim Cramer guest star on next week’s ‘The Celebrity Apprentice'” [NBC]

(NBC Photo: Nicole Rivelli)

Suburbarazzi Week in Review on RNN: Goodbye to a beard (David Letterman), a camera (Stephen Baldwin) and 2007 (Hayden Pannetierre and Lindsay Lohan)

Download:

At the end of the video and after the break is the answer to this week’s quiz: Of the following celebrities who have called Mount Vernon home, who was scheduled to receive a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame today?

A. Sean “Diddy” Combs
B. Sidney Poitier
C. Phylicia Rashad
D. Denzel Washington

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Stephen Baldwin says he hearts Huckabee, rejects gay marriage and no longer photographs porn patrons

baldwin-camera.jpgUpper Grandview resident Stephen Baldwin said Thursday that he is a “full-blown, super-duper” supporter of Republican presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee and shares his stance against gay marriage.

Baldwin made the statements while calling into the Howard Stern show to promote his appearance on “Celebrity Apprentice,” hosted by Westchester real estate maven Donald Trump. Baldwin, who is the conservative yang to brother Alec’s liberal yin, said he’d ban gay marriage if he were president:

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I don’t believe that gay marriage is in line with God’s Word, which is found in the Bible. So, what I think doesn’t matter; what I believe is what’s in the Bible and the Bible says that gay marriage is not acceptable.

</div></blockquote>

Stephen Baldwin also told Stern he stopped taking photos of the license plates belonging to patrons of an adult entertainment store in Nyack. (“I’m done with that.”) Baldwin once threatened to track down the identities of the vehicle owners and publish the names in full-page newspaper ads.

UPDATE: Web site Good As You has audio of the Stephen Baldwin clip here.

(Photo by Natalie Jade Ray for The Journal News)

Stephen Baldwin and the mysterious case of the Loco Joe swindlers

locojoe2.jpgIt’s unlikely that anyone remembers the Loco Joe cappucino soft drink, much less that Stephen Baldwin was one of its pitchmen. Except, that is, the good ol’ New York Post. The paper broke news on the 23rd that the owner of Charity Beverage USA (which was supposed to use profits from drink sales to fund breast-cancer research and “other charities”) was actually skimming more than $1 million off the top. The perp in question is Bill Richards, who was charged with theft by deception in NJ and sentenced to five years probation.

While Baldwin, who lives in Upper Grandview and was only actively promoting the drink back in 2004, doesn’t appear to be connected to any of the wrongdoing, there is one strange loose end in the case. Richards is still apparently trying to shake down investors. On Distributorship.com — “The place to find the best business opportunities, best franchise opportunities, wholesale beverages and available beverage distributors on the internet” — you can still inquire about being a Loco Joe vendor. What’s more, Baldwin is still an (unwitting?) shill for the company, with the following testimonial proudly featured on the site:

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Dear Friend,

You do not have to look very far to see that coffee is big…we here at Charity Beverage USA are currently preparing to go nation wide, with a great new tasting drink called loco Joe iced cappuccino, using the new innovative 8.25 oz ready to drink Tetra Prisma packaging.

We hope that you will join us in the exciting chance, to take hold and control a part of the huge ready to drink coffee market. Not only is this a great opportunity for your own success, but its also a great chance to make a difference in lives of so many others.

Stephen Baldwin
Media Promotions</div></blockquote>

While I can’t claim to have ever tasted the “innovative” 8.25 oz drink myself, and thus cannot endorse it or its distributorship opportunities, I do have to hand it to Richards. For a business named Loco Joe, nice choice of spokesperson!

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Stephen Baldwin stole Michael Lohan’s shot at becoming the next Apprentice

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Perhaps the most telling thing to come out of the news that Stephen Baldwin will be competing on the next season of “The Apprentice”: He wasn’t The Donald’s first choice. Michael Lohan was.

Tabloid Baby claims that Lohan had already accepted the offer to appear on the show when NBC lawyers learned of the wayward dad’s criminal past and current parole. That’s when Baldwin, an Upper Grandview resident, stepped in to pinch hit.

As we’ve reported before, the two born-again ministers (Baldwin and Lohan, that is) became buddies while trying to launch a $15 million teen detox center on Long Island. It’s good to see the two tag-teaming yet again on another worthy cause.

(Lohan: AP Photo/ Dick Yarwood; Baldwin: Gwynne Johnson / Rockland Magazine)