Upper Grandview resident Stephen Baldwin said Thursday that he is a “full-blown, super-duper” supporter of Republican presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee and shares his stance against gay marriage.

Baldwin made the statements while calling into the Howard Stern show to promote his appearance on “Celebrity Apprentice,” hosted by Westchester real estate maven Donald Trump. Baldwin, who is the conservative yang to brother Alec’s liberal yin, said he’d ban gay marriage if he were president:

I don’t believe that gay marriage is in line with God’s Word, which is found in the Bible. So, what I think doesn’t matter; what I believe is what’s in the Bible and the Bible says that gay marriage is not acceptable.

Stephen Baldwin also told Stern he stopped taking photos of the license plates belonging to patrons of an adult entertainment store in Nyack. (“I’m done with that.”) Baldwin once threatened to track down the identities of the vehicle owners and publish the names in full-page newspaper ads.

UPDATE: Web site Good As You has audio of the Stephen Baldwin clip here.

(Photo by Natalie Jade Ray for The Journal News)

It’s unlikely that anyone remembers the Loco Joe cappucino soft drink, much less that Stephen Baldwin was one of its pitchmen. Except, that is, the good ol’ New York Post. The paper broke news on the 23rd that the owner of Charity Beverage USA (which was supposed to use profits from drink sales to fund breast-cancer research and “other charities”) was actually skimming more than $1 million off the top. The perp in question is Bill Richards, who was charged with theft by deception in NJ and sentenced to five years probation.

While Baldwin, who lives in Upper Grandview and was only actively promoting the drink back in 2004, doesn’t appear to be connected to any of the wrongdoing, there is one strange loose end in the case. Richards is still apparently trying to shake down investors. On Distributorship.com—“The place to find the best business opportunities, best franchise opportunities, wholesale beverages and available beverage distributors on the internet”—you can still inquire about being a Loco Joe vendor. What’s more, Baldwin is still an (unwitting?) shill for the company, with the following testimonial proudly featured on the site:

Dear Friend,

You do not have to look very far to see that coffee is big…we here at Charity Beverage USA are currently preparing to go nation wide, with a great new tasting drink called loco Joe iced cappuccino, using the new innovative 8.25 oz ready to drink Tetra Prisma packaging.

We hope that you will join us in the exciting chance, to take hold and control a part of the huge ready to drink coffee market. Not only is this a great opportunity for your own success, but its also a great chance to make a difference in lives of so many others.

Stephen Baldwin
Media Promotions

While I can’t claim to have ever tasted the “innovative” 8.25 oz drink myself, and thus cannot endorse it or its distributorship opportunities, I do have to hand it to Richards. For a business named Loco Joe, nice choice of spokesperson!

After a busy 2006—during which Baldwin led a public crusade to stop a porn store from opening in Nyack; wrote his own born-again memoir, The Unusual Suspect; and starred in a slew of low-budget films—the Upper Grandview resident spent much of 2007 focusing on his spiritual side. As self-appointed leader of the evangelical, extreme-sports-based Breakthrough Ministry, St. Stephen preached the Good Book out of the back of his van and was even appointed as a “cultural advisor� to President Bush. Alas, his acting career wasn’t as enlightened. While brothers Alec and Billy had hits with 30 Rock and Dirty, Sexy, Money, the best Stephen could do was Celebrity Bull Riding Challenge. It was painful to watch, and we’re not just talking about Baldwin’s broken rib and shoulder.

Prediction for 2008: Let’s hope that was his last celebrity-themed reality-TV travesty. Why not try teaming up with fellow man of faith Mel Gibson?

Ed. Note: Yes, another Baldwin. And Yes, it has finally happened: Stephen has outranked one of his brothers on a list. Granted, the two were separated in our magazine versions of “People of the Year” (Billy appeared in InTown, Stephen in Rockland). But for the purposes of this celebrity-only list on Suburbarazzi, Stephen still comes out on top in our estimation.

Adapted from “People of the Year,” Rockland Magazine, December 2007

Illustration by Ismael Roldon

Perhaps the most telling thing to come out of the news that Stephen Baldwin will be competing on the next season of “The Apprentice”: He wasn’t The Donald’s first choice. Michael Lohan was.

Tabloid Baby claims that Lohan had already accepted the offer to appear on the show when NBC lawyers learned of the wayward dad’s criminal past and current parole. That’s when Baldwin, an Upper Grandview resident, stepped in to pinch hit.

As we’ve reported before, the two born-again ministers (Baldwin and Lohan, that is) became buddies while trying to launch a $15 million teen detox center on Long Island. It’s good to see the two tag-teaming yet again on another worthy cause.

(Lohan: AP Photo/ Dick Yarwood; Baldwin: Gwynne Johnson / Rockland Magazine)

It shouldn’t surprise anyone that reality-TV regular Stephen Baldwin would leap at the chance to star in Donald Trump’s new “celebrity” version of “The Apprentic.” But watching the Upper Grandview resident try to sell weiners on a New York street—one of the show’s elimination challenges—with fellow contestants Lennox Lewis, Gene Simmons, and Vincent “Big Pussy” Pastore was … well, kind of sad.

Then again, if Rosie had somehow signed on for this wackiness, it might have become truly transcendent.

Watch video of the hot dog challenge over at TMZ. (NBC’s thugs try to block the footage initially, but watch long enough and you’ll see Baldwin, et al, giving their all at the hot dog cart.)

(photo: Gwynne Johnson/Rockland Magazine)

The only thing better than getting stalked by Suburbarazzi? Having your wife invent your own imaginary stalker just to fluff up your ego. And if that wife happens to be the incredibly hot 1/3 of Wilson Phillips, all the better.

According to Star Pulse, Bedford’s Billy Baldwin was the recipient of just such a prank at the hands of his wife, Chynna Philips. The made-up stalker, “Melissa Farrell,” was exposed at a family Thanksgiving party by brother (and Upper Grandview resident) Stephen Baldwin.

Billy’s take on the whole stalker affair is after the break …

Thank God for Google News alerts. If not for them, how else would I have stumbled upon the LAist blog’s outstanding comparison of a sculpture at The Getty Museum to Stephen Baldwin’s kidneys? And I quote …

L.A.-based contemporary artist, Tim Hawkinson, has been showcasing his latest work, Zoopsia (Visual hallucinations of animals) which will be on display until Sept. 9th. The exhibit is anchored by the gargantuan installation of Hawkinson’s Uberorgan. Don’t confuse this towering work of art for Stephen Baldwin’s kidney, built with giant biomorphic balloons and tentacle-like horns that angle toward the central rotunda of the museum’s Entrance Hall, this is a musical instrument. The Uberorgan has a 250-foot long scroll that is deciphered by switches in a player and creates a slow symphony that sounds like a belching elephant bellowing in various octaves.

I’m still puzzling over why exactly the comparison was made to Upper Grandview’s Stevie B. But I like it. Really like it.

LAist, you are hereby awarded the first (and perhaps only) Suburbarazzi Simile of the Month award.

(Photo by Gwynne Johnson/Rockland Magazine)

Yesterday, I chatted on RNN about the “Sesame Street” contributions of former Lower Hudson Valley residents Matt Lauer and Al Roker; the perilous bull-related accident of Upper Grandview resident Stephen Baldwin; and the appearances of Piermont resident and “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” alumnus Alan Ruck on “The Bronx is Burning.”

After the break, find out the answer to this week’s quiz question: Yorktown High School alumnus Eric Stein appears on what current reality TV show?

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Stop the presses! Upper Grandview resident Stephen Baldwin is this month’s Rosie O’Donnell as far as Suburbarazzi is concerned.

First, Suburbarazzi shared news of his evangelical works at the 11th Annual Generation Conference. Earlier today, ‘Razzi reported how this (non-Alec) Baldwin headed to Bulgaria to work on a film with a (non-Scarlett) Johansson.

Now, remember that TV show Ted Mann told you about in June? The one for which Stevie B. and Vanilla Ice planned to go bull-riding? Well, TMZ now has a clip of Stephen Baldwin’s shoulder and rib snapping as he falls off one of them doggies.

After the rodeo fall, Baldwin sports an American flag hat and says “When I breathe, it ain’t fun,” in what might or might not be a southern accent. (Dude, you’re from Massapequa!)

Let us now praise Bulgarian casting directors, the only true visionaries left in movie business. Or at least, the only ones desperate (or underfunded) enough to still cast the great Stephen Baldwin.

Either way, it’s good news for the Upper Grandview resident, who has just landed a role in “Shark in Venice,” which, according to this Bulgarian website, just began shooting at Nu Boyana Film Studios in Sofia. Directed by Danny Lerner, the movie will also feature Vanessa Johansson, Scarlett J’s older sibling—and, I presume, Esquire’s Sexiest Woman Alive in Training.

Upper Grandview’s Stephen Baldwin continues to bring the word of the lord to our country’s youth. Last week he made the trek up to Utica, New York, for the 11th Annual Generation Conference. 1,500 people were registered for the event, the theme of which was “Loving God and Loving People.”

What did Stevie B. have to contribute? Well, as far as I could glean from an interview he gave with a local TV station, it was that kids today—especially the Lindsay Lohan types—need to have a more hard-core spirituality. That is, not to “have it be something that’s not this Golly gee willikers gosh golly watered down version of it,” as Baldwin said. “I really think there’s an opportunity for this next generation to be the biggest and greatest movement of revival Americans ever seen,” he continued, “And I’m happy to be a part of it.”

Likewise, Stephen. I’m gosh golly gee willikers happy you’re a part of it.

And of course, always a little creeped out at the same time.

“Stephen Baldwin speaks to youth at Generation Conference at Utica Aud” [UKTV2]

Stephen Baldwin pal Michael Lohan (the two are preaching the gospel together to troubled teens in Long Island) is currently battling his estranged wife, Dina, over the custody of his four children. But how will a judge react to the fact that Papa Lohan can’t even spell his famous daughter’s name correctly?

In a statement he issued to the press earlier this week, Michael said, “I look forward to order being restored to the chaos that our family life has become. Lyndsay, Michael, Ali and Cody need stability and both of their parents in their lives. I am anxious to spend time with them and end this cruel, needless separation.”

For the record, her name is Lindsay.