Solemnity Alert: All joking about Anna Nicole Smith’s death will hereby cease

Suburbarazzi’s faithful readers have spoken. About a week ago we asked whether or not it’s appropriate to joke about Anna Nicole Smith in our sidebar poll. With almost 300 votes cast, the answer is clear.

annanicolepoll.jpgThe question, of course, was prompted by the news that View co-host Rosie O’Donnell had mocked Smith on the morning of her death. However, 164 of our readers overwhelming voted that NO, it is not appropriate to crack wise about the tragedy.

As for whether Rosie was in the right, only a paltry 16 agreed with the Queen of Nice, while 38 chose the user-submitted answer of “Just for once… Rosie should shut her mouth and go away for a while.”

Perhaps most astonishing of all was the second user-submitted answer — “The Cruel constant Joking about her contributed to her death” — which 25 people voted for. I’m not sure if that makes Rosie an accessory to murder or what, but either way, I want no part of it.

So, let’s move on to less controversial subject-matter … like, say, Howard Stern. The shock-jock’s recent engagement makes me wonder, has he finally found Mrs. Right after all? Personally, I always envisioned him getting married to Jessica Hahn. But what do you think?

Weigh in with who you think Stern’s soul mate is in our new sidebar poll on the right.

Joan Rivers literally gives a piece of Vincent Price to Howard Stern sidekick

Former Briarcliff Manor deejay Howard Stern walked away from Wednesday morning’s show with an earful of jokes about his once-improbable engagement to model Beth Ostrosky. Today, his long-time sidekick, Robin Quivers, walked away with a handful of Vincent Price’s ashes, thanks to red-carpet fashion critic Joan Rivers.

The legendary comedienne, who once lived in Larchmont, said she finds it “comforting” to collect the ashes of celebrities and/or friends of hers, including her ex-husband, her dogs and everybody’s favorite “Thriller” narrator.

“I’m trying to get Anna Nicole Smith,” she joked.

The last time Rivers visited Stern at his Sirius studio, Quivers told her that she was a big fan of the horror icon and wanted some of his ashes. Stern said the show received e-mail protesting Quivers’ request.

Stern himself wasn’t sure how to react at Rivers’ generosity. Find out his reaction, Rivers’ justification and Quivers’ intentions, after the break.

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Judge Judy explains to Larry King where Putnam County is; King tells Judy’s son to ‘Go get ‘em’

Judge Judy was on Larry King Live last night. The highlight of course was the two of them talking about Putnam and Judge Judy’s son, Adam Levy, who is running for the county’s D.A. seat.
<blockquote><div>Judy: My son is running for the district attorney’s position in Putnam County where he lives…

Larry: Putnam County is north of the…uh…city?

Judy: North of Westchester, a little north of Westchester.

Larry: How old?

Judy: 38. He’s dynamic. He’s got a sense of justice that he learned I like to think living in a household [with me].

Larry: How many people in the race?

Judy: As far as I’m concerned? One.

Larry: Are you going to campaign for him?

Judy: Absolutely.

Larry: We wish him luck. His first name is?

Judy: Adam…Levy.

Larry: Go get ‘em Adam!</div></blockquote>

After the break, Judy and Larry on Hillary, Rudy, Britney, Paris, and of course Anna Nicole…oh, and Brooklyn!

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Correction: Rosie doesn’t think Anna Nicole was “loose change,” just a kamikaze Macy’s Thanksgiving balloon

“Not everyone has a tether,” Rosie O’Donnell began, giving her post-mortem assessment of Anna Nicole Smith’s life on today’s episode of “The View.”


In the Macy’s thanksgiving day parade, there are all these balloons and everyone looks at them. It’s kind of like a metaphor for fame. But what do they have? 200 people beneath with hooks and ropes holding onto the balloon to make sure it doesn’t go out of its way and hurt and kill anyone.</div></blockquote>

Barbara Walters then went on to speculate whether Howard K. Stern might have been Smith’s tether, to which Rosie replied that he appeared to have an addiction — like a certain “American Idol” judge — and that didn’t make him much of a tether.

You see there? Notice how she managed to bridge the conversation to her next celebrity feud. Well done, Rosie. Well done.

Video of Rosie’s “balloon” comments [TMZ]

(ABC photo/Donna Svennevik)

Unlike Anna Nicole Smith, Donald Trump won’t let Rosie O’Donnell feud die

Initially calling in to discuss the death of Anna Nicole Smith, Bedford property owner Donald Trump ripped into a small army of LoHud personalities and O.J. Simpson this morning on the radio show of Howard Stern (not to be confused with Howard K. Stern, Smith’s former attorney and alleged father to her newborn daughter).

Trump on attorney Howard K. Stern: “There’s something with that guy. I think he’s just bad news. … He’s a loser. He’s a loser. I think he’s some kind of a degenerate, in my opinion, and his whole life revolved around (Smith). And by the way, I give him zero (chance) that it’s his baby.”

Trump on Anna Nicole Smith: “I know a lot of beautiful models, and they’re saying, ‘Oh, she’s so dumb. She’s so dumb,’ and in the meantime, she (had) a shot at $500 million and they don’t. … How did she lose the weight, do you think? … I think she had the operation.”

Trump on Nyack resident Rosie O’Donnell: “I understand her; I don’t like her. She is not a smart person. She’s just a bully. … I think you have to be vicious when you’re dealing with a vicious person. … I got, I would say, 85 percent (of e-mails) in favor of the way (I handled the feud). And I had a lot of good friends of mine say, ‘Donald, why do you attack her?’ And I say, ‘Because I have to.’ Genetically, I have to. In other words, she made statements about me that were totally false, then corrected those statements. But you know what? She was more angry at anything that I gave Miss USA a second chance.”

Find out what Trump said about Barbara Walters, radio host Howard Stern and O.J. Simpson after the break.

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Rosie continues feuding with dead Anna Nicole, calling her “Loose Change”

It’s an unprecendented move. After instigating fights with living celebrities like Donald Trump, Kelly Ripa, and Oprah, Rosie O’Donnell is now attempting to spark a battle with the recently deceased Anna Nicole. On her website yesterday, the South Nyack resident posted another of her cryptic free-verse diatribes:


This of course came on the heels of her on-air rant about Anna Nicole on Thursday’s “The View,” which as the last line suggests, was just hours before Smith was pronounced dead. The above post appears to be a disapproving recap of the past couple days’ headlines from the Drudge Report, which has latched onto the story like just about every other media outlet (even Jim Lehrer).

No idea what the “LOOSE CHANGE” line is all about — and since Friday’s “View” was pre-taped we won’t get her thoughts on Smith’s death ’til Monday — but one thing’s certain: Ro’s has absolutely no interest in removing the foot from her mouth. It’s hard to imagine what kind of reaction she’ll get from baiting celebs in the afterlife. Will Smith’s mom join the feud by proxy? Might Clay Aiken chime in? Will the ghost of J. Howard Marshall unleash a can of undead whoopass?

Stay tuned on Monday to find out. And in the meantime, vote in our sidebar poll on whether, in light of Smith’s death, you think it’s still appropriate to joke about her.

When Rosie O’Donnell wants Anna Nicole Smith off TV, she WANTS SMITH OFF TV

Granted, Nyack resident Rosie O’Donnell might not have been able to predict Anna Nicole Smith’s fate when she ripped into Smith Thursday morning on “The View.” But as noted that afternoon, it might not have been the best idea for O’Donnell to say…

<blockquote><div>If I have to see Anna Nicole Smith one more time on television….</div></blockquote>

…and tease Smith for allegedly using a “medication or substance.”

More ominous were the five words O’Donnell uttered after offering an unflattering impression of Smith:

<blockquote><div>It’s a tragedy all around.


With 20/20 hindsight, O’Donnell’s probably sorry for the timing of her anti-Smith remarks. But there’d a greater lesson here: Don’t cross Rosie. Or you might (coincidentally) die.

Donald Trump might want to update his will right about now to ensure his Bedford property winds up in the right hands.

Which leads me to my next point. Rosie, this part’s for you:

For the record, Ro (I can call you Ro, right?): The only time I’ve teased you on Suburbarazzi is when I implied that “Exit To Eden” was not exactly Oscar-caliber. But come on, you know even then I was just teasing, right? Tee-hee? Ha-ha? (Cough.)

Please forgive me, Ro! I want to live. I WANT TO LIVE!

[Video: Rosie O’Donnell criticizes Anna Nicole Smith on “The View,” hours before Smith’s death.]

(Associated Press file photo by Mary Altaffer)