Mary J. Blige pulls a Roger Clemens

blonde-blige.jpgAfter the Times Union of Albany broke news that singer Mary J. Blige was going to be listed in a scathing report about steroid abuse in the entertainment biz, reps for the Yonkers native blasted back to the NY Daily News, “Mary J. Blige has never taken any performance-enhancing illegal steroids.” That quote came from Blige’s spokeswoman, Karynne Tencer.

Although the Albany DA behind the report has yet to confirm the names leaked from the report (including 50 Cent, Timbaland, Tyler Perry, Blige, and more), the news account asserts that “Records shared with the Times Union and information from several cooperating witnesses on Long Island indicate Blige and other stars were shipped prescribed human growth hormone or steroids — sometimes under fictitious names — at hotels, production studios, private residences, an upscale Manhattan fitness club and through the Long Island office of Michael Diamond, a chiropractor affiliated with the celebrities.”

Diamond’s anti-aging program is run out of Clay Gym in Manhattan. So far, Blige and the other stars implicated haven’t denied an association with Diamond.

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The big question right now is whether Diamond is the source of part or all of the DA’s investigation and, if so, whether Blige (and others) will simply claim that he’s lying — we’ll call that the Full Clemens. Then again, if the lawyers up in Albany are seriously considering filing charges against the entertainers, perhaps Blige may agree to testify and cop a plea. Maybe in exchange for a little Clemens-y.

If you’re still wondering why on earth rappers would need to take steroids in the first place, MTV news has an interesting take on that. In short, “The thought is that HGH specifically brings levels of testosterone back up. Dr. Barnes said benefits can include thickening of the hair and skin and ‘a luster again in the eyes and basically helping the body look more vigorous.'”

And here I thought Mary J.’s blindingly bright locks were all thanks to hair dye. You learn something every day!

UPDATE: Diamond has indeed confirmed many of the celebrity names in the doping report, the Times Union reports today, so it would appear that he’ll be playing the McNamee role in this new doping saga. Interestingly, the names were actually first discovered when authorities raided an Orlando pharmacy last year and turned up a folder marked “VIP customers.” That folder let them to Diamond, who runs a family chiropractor practice. But it looks like Clay Gym in Manhattan, where Diamond was a physical training adviser to the celebs, is where most of them hooked up with him. According to the Times Union account, his job there has been suspended.

(Blige: AP Photo/Diane Bondareff / Other photos: AP)

Mary J. Blige joins Fiddy and Tyler Perry on list of celebrity steroid users

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Already well on her way to elbowing DMX out of the 2008 Suburbarazzi People of the Year list, Yonkers native Mary J. Blige was named in a Times Union of Albany story that says she has received or used performance enhancing drugs. Get it, performance enhancing?

The story was drawing from an investigation conducted by Albany D.A. P. David Soares, who is apparently doing for the R&B and entertainment biz what George Mitchell did for pro baseball.

Also listed in the report: 50 Cent, Timbaland, Wyclef Jean, and author/producer/actor Tyler Perry. The Soares report found that most of the steroids originated from Signature Pharmacy in Orlando, Florida. To date, 10 defendants have pled guilty, though it’s not clear who they are. Perry and the other celebs mentioned in the article have yet to comment.

“Entertainers named in DA steroid report” [LoHud]

(AP Photo/Diane Bondareff)

Paul Shaffer, David Letterman power 50 Cent’s ‘Ayo Technology’

paul-david-502.jpgI saw this clip of 50 Cent’s infectious “Ayo Technology” rerun on “Late Show with David Letterman” shortly after the Writers’ Guild of America strike began and have been meaning to blog about it ever since. It’s simultaneously awesome and awkward, which makes it a perfect fit for Suburbarazzi.

No shortage of things to look out for here:

1. Bedford resident Paul Shaffer’s CBS Orchestra does an impressive job recreating Timbaland’s heavily produced track, right down to the intricate and hyperactive video-game beeps that Shaffer appears to be duplicating on keyboards. Reminiscent of LL Cool J’s “MTV Unplugged” episode.
2. Although the song’s featured vocalist, Justin Timberlake, is nowhere to be found, 50 still gives him a shout-out at the beginning.
3. The opening half-rhyme scheme was altered not only to please the FCC, but also a certain North Salem resident at the end: “50 Cent, Justin, Timbaland, Letterman.”
4. 50 Cent sings like Justin raps.
5. Old folks in the Ed Sullivan Theatre throwin’ their hands up!

What else did you love/hate about this clip?

(AP Photos — Shaffer by Diane Bondareff; 50 Cent by Kevork Djansezian; Letterman by Adam Rountree)

50 Cent takes his place alongside cinematic legends DeNiro, Pacino

AP Photo/Kevork Djansezian

A while ago we reported that Sneden’s Landing resident Al Pacino would be reteaming with Robert DeNiro for the first time since “Heat,” but there’s a new twist in their joint venture. That would be the casting of the film’s male lead #3: 50 Cent.

According to the Hollywood Reporter (via Billboard), 50 is in “final negotiations” to co-star in the film, “Righteous Kill,” portraying a drug dealer who helps DeNiro and Pacino track down a serial killer.

Sorry Mos Def and Ludacris, looks like “The Woodsman” and “Crash” has kinda of burned off whatever reformed-gansta street cred you once had. And should 50 ever appear to be too “Hollywood,” might I propose an understudy? Mount Kisco’s own DMX, with two warrants still out for his arrest, is surely looking for film work.

The movie starts shooting this September and is due in theaters in 2008.

So some rappers are homophobic? What?

In an interview with AllHipHop.com, the rapper, Deadlee, who is gay, singled out Eminem, 50 Cent, and sometime-Mount Kisco resident DMX as over-the-top homophobes in the rap industry.

tjndc5-5basrmij174mhzbe6bw_layout.jpgWhy is DMX an alleged homophobe? Deadlee says it’s his constant use of the word fa***t and his references to “homo thugs,â€? according to the website. “I find it crazy when his videos are very homoerotic,” the rapper says. “All the guys kicking it with their shirts off!”

Okay, so maybe DMX has issues with sexuality. But 50 Cent? Why would anyone accuse him of being homophobic?

Well, it could have something to do with comments like the ones he made to Playboy magazine a few years back: “I ain’t into fa***ts…I don’t like gay people around me, because I’m not comfortable with what their thoughts are.â€?

To be fair, though, the rapper and newly minted movie star added: “Women who like women, that’s cool.”

(AP Photo/ Louis Lanzano)