Sean Penn will be at the Pelham Picture House tonight for a screening of his new film, Into The Wild. Michael Douglas will be there on Thursday for a screening of his upcoming film, King of California. Both screenings will be followed by Q&As with film critic Peter Travers. ($45; 7pm; www.thepicturehouse.org; 175 Wolfs Lane; Pelham).

Up north a bit, Julie Taymor will be at the Jacob Burns Film Center for a screening and Q&A about her new film, Across the Universe, a musical using various Beatles’ tunes. The famed director will then discuss the movie with critic Janet Maslin ($20; 7pm; www.burnsfilmcenter.org; 364 Manville Rd.; Pleasantville; 914-747-5555).

(AP Photos/Jerome Delay, Venezuelan Culture Ministry, Michel Spingler) 

Here’s the update: She made it, she’s still in one piece…and yesterday she interviewed Pres. Bush. Wow, it’s like everybody’s in Iraq this week.

Look for her first live broadcast tonight.

(AP Photo/Charles Dharapak, CBS News)

Voss: If the Baldwin brothers were gay, who would get the hottest guys?

Billy: It would have to be me, because I’ve always gotten the hottest chicks. I’m the tall, thin, good-looking, intelligent, talented, charming one,
and all the other brothers are all the other things.

Elsewhere Billy discussed the the burden of carrying the Baldwin tag.

Sometimes it can backfire, with Stephen being the holy roller, Daniel having the rap sheet a mile long, and Alec with his current exploits
in the media. One of my friends mailed me a shirt they were selling on
Melrose that said NOT A BALDWIN. I guess it was supposed to be worn by
geeky guys to say, “I’m not that good-looking.” But I wore it to a
party and someone thought that I was jokingly trying to hide my
identity, like I was ashamed to admit that I was in the Baldwin
family. [Laughs] Look, we’ve had a couple of weeks of bad press—Danny
got locked up, Alec’s voice mail to his daughter—but it’s not like I’m
ready to cut and run.

(AP Photo/Seth Wenig) 

Helmsley––who went to prison for tax evasion and is reported to have once said, “only the little people pay taxes”––is remembered by many as the worst thing to come out of the 80s (besides leg-warmers).

Some of her relatives did benefit from her passing: Her brother, Alvin Rosenthal, who will care for the dog–named Trouble–will receive “millions,” according to the AP, as will two of her four grandchildren (offspring of her deceased son Jay Panzirer). However, the kids must visit their father’s grave site once a year…otherwise neither will get “a penny” of the $5 million she left for each (seriously, this sounds like some macabre black comedy).

The two grandkids who were cut off are Craig and Meegan Panzirer. The “reasons…are known to them,” Helmsley wrote in her will.
Also stipulated in the will: When Trouble dies, Helmsley wants her remains to be buried next to her own remains in the Helmsley mausoleum, which must be “washed or steam-cleaned at least once a year.” She left $3 million for its upkeep.
Also receiving money: her chauffeur, Nicholas Celea ($100,000). The rest will go to the Leona M. and Harry B. Helmsley Charitable Trust.

So, if you’re keeping track of her priorities: The dog gets $12 million. The good grandkids get $5 million, her mausoleum get $3 million, her driver gets $100,000 and her other grandkids get nothing.

Rest in peace, Leona.

(AP Photo/Jennifer Graylock)

Next week, the CBS Evening News anchor will celebrate her one year anniversary on the job by reporting from Syria and then Iraq on a “high-risk tour,” according to Variety. Her last trip overseas was back in November when she accompanied President Bush to Amman, Jordan (which is less bomb-y than Iraq but still not exactly the Upper West Side).

Couric’s entourage will be skeletal, according to the newspaper–just Kaplan, D.C. bureau chief Christopher Isham, and editor Jerry Cipriano. The group leaves today and will spend the next week reporting before she begins broadcasting live on September 4th.

Kaplan says Couric’s presence has helped land high-level interviews with “reclusive politicians and alleged terror leaders.”
Couric is a single mother of two and has said in the past that that role would color her decision when it comes to taking risky assignments.

One side benefit of the 12-day trip: Couric will be out of the country while author Edward Klein hits the media circuit to tout his inflammatory “tell-all” about the anchor, which the Washington Post summed up thusly yesterday:

She’s conniving and self-absorbed and ungrateful. And shallow. And into younger men. And older men. She makes too much money, and she yelled at her husband. And she’s had work done. And she’s liberal. And she was mean to Ann Curry. . . .

(AP Photo/Jeff Christensen)

Then, the mag asked her, “Did Rosie’s nemesis Donald Trump call you to congratulate you?”

Her response? “No but Donald’s nice.”

Nice? Donald Trump, nice? Is it just me or is that a slap in the face to Rosie? Hmmm. Talk amongst yourselves.

(AP Photo/ Louis Lanzano)

According to The Journal News, her reverend and friend, Charles P. Pridemore of the Trinity Episcopal Church in Ossining, was by her side this weekend, as was her son, when she passed.

I was with her a few minutes after she died. ... she had her dogs – Boysie and Girlsie – I don’t know if they were in the room, but they were still there. She was surrounded by beautiful, fresh-cut flowers and the people who loved her most.

Astor was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the nation’s highest civilian honor, in 1998, for her charity efforts.

She’s quoted as saying: “Money is like manure, it should be spread around.” She married into the Astor family when she was in her 40s. Her husband, Vincent Astor, was the great-great-grandson of John Jacob Astor, who made his fortune in fur trading and New York real estate. When Astor died, she inherited a fortune of $67 million.

Her charity work for places like the New York Public Library, Carnegie Hall, the Museum of Natural History, Central Park, the Bronx Zoo and the Metropolitan Museum of Art is well known. However, she also gave to the Apollo Theater and to various other community projects. She was also quite active in the village of Briarcliff.

Astor was born Brooke Russell March 30, 1902. She was nine years younger than the oldest known person in the world, who, coincidentally, also passed away yesterday.

(AP Photo/Marty Lederhandler, 1989)

The incident happened in Miami on Saturday night. O’Donnell and girlfriend Kelli Carpenter were heading back to their convertible after finishing dinner when “a bald screaming infuriated man” ran toward their car screaming about his nearby motorcycle, according to O’Donnell on her blog.
“chill dude – we didn’t touch it,” the former View host reports she said (in her trademark online haiku style).

However, it soon escalated to “name-calling.”

As we all know, Rosie is not one to back down from a fight, so even as the Harley rider began “snorting like a dragon” and calling the women “f***ing lesbians” Rosie held her ground.

O’Donnell says she stood up, raised her hands over her head and – smiling – yelled back, “CORRECT SIR.”

The biker then stormed off.

Maybe it’s time for Rosie to head home to Nyack.

(AP Photo/Jae C. Hong)

So what gives?

Nah, the breakup rumor sounds better.

(AP Photo/Stuart Ramson) 

Who are they?

Zac Efron, 19, star of High School Musical.

Dyland and Cole Sprouse, 15, stars of Disney’s The Suite Life of Zack and Cody.

Emma Roberts (niece of Julia), 16, star of Nickelodeon’s Unfabulous.

And–of course–Rockland’s own Hayden Panettiere, 17, the breakout star of NBC’s Heroes, who, according to the magazine, makes somewhere between $30,000 and $50,000 an episode. The mag dubs her the next “Jennifer Garner.”

In a separate TV Guide story, the teen queen sites Grace Kelly as one of her favorite actresses.

My mom always said: ‘When you’re an actress, you want to be like that. You want to have that class, that elegance. Don’t be one of the wild, crazy girls.’ It was great advice.

(AP Photo/Chris Park) 

Tonight, she’ll conclude her reporting on Nightline with what TV Newser calls “an in-depth story.”

Snow has been covering the Chappaqua resident’s various projects throughout the continent. Yesterday, Snow described Clinton as something of a rock star.

In Africa, they seem to be on a first-name basis with the former President, shouting Bill, Bill.

Some conservative blogs have criticized her story for being overly deferential to the possible future first gentleman.  Tune in tonight and judge for yourself.

(AP Photo/Mark Humphrey) 

So I bit the bullet and watched it last night. And now I can respond to everyone, “Yes, I’ve seen it. It’s awesome. Now shut up.” Here’s the thing, I’d watch Glenn Close give a stage reading of the phone book. She’s just one of those actresses! But this role is perfect for her–dark, strong, difficult to read. And you can tell Close is having a great time with it (I’m sure she’s been rehearsing her Emmy speech since she first read the script). [[SPOILER ALERT]] The closing image of her on a beachfront pier, effortlessly tossing the bloody dog collar into the sea, reminded me of Barbara Stanwyck circa Double Indemnity. She’s just so effortlessly cool, sexy, and vicious.

The show itself is twisted and fun–though I could have done without the gimmicky flash-forwards. Nevertheless, Ted Danson and Rose Byrne (who is quickly becoming one of my favorite young actresses) both give can’t-turn-away performances. Needless to say, it’s going to be a long summer.

(Added bonus: producers promise the plot won’t be dragged on for years. There will be a resolution to the story by the end of the season and a new story arch will commence next year. Thank God for that!)

(AP Photo/FX, Larry Riley)

And who is it? Keep reading.

Okay, it’s not a huge shocker. She has been co-hosting pretty consistently since May. But there were plenty of women either overtly or covertly vying for the position. And, apparently, producers didn’t listen to Suburbarazzi, when we analyzed the contenders for the moderator chair last month. Goldberg came in forth behind Gayle King, Joy Behar, and Kathy Griffin. See results here.

(AP Photo/Empire State Building, Donna F. Aceto) 

Later in the show, the singer told the audience, “Can I ask you a favor? If you taped that, please don’t put it on Youtube.”

Did the audience listen?

Um, you can check out the various videos of the incident on Youtube here, here, and here.

(AP Photo/Alex Brandon) 

God help us all if this becomes another Paris Hilton fiasco! Can she just go to jail (preferably for a long time) without any attention? The starlet, who is currently out of rehab (good job, Wonderland) and wearing an ankle bracelet that is supposed to monitor alcohol consumption (good job, um, whichever company makes that), was arrested by police in Santa Monica after they spotted her chasing another car a little after 2:00 in the morning. Her blood alcohol level was between .12 and .13 (California’s legal limit is .08). While searching her, cops found cocaine in her pocket. She was charged with two misdemeanors, driving under the influence and driving with a suspended license, and two felonies, possession of cocaine and transport of narcotics.

She has been released on $25,000 bail. The actress had been promoting her new film, “I Know Who Killed Me” (my guess: a mix of Jim Beam and cocaine?) and was actually scheduled to appear on the Tonight Show this evening. That will probably be canceled. As you’ll recall, Lohan is already facing a DUI charge from an incident in May when she crashed her Mercedes (hence, the 45-day rehab stint). She was scheduled to appear in court August 24th on those previous charges.

(AP Photo/Santa Monica Police)

On its website, TMZ asked,  “What’s he so pissed about? It was the public that had to endure ‘You, Me and Dupree’!”

And this is how they described the incident (note, the video shows something not quite so dramatic):

The other Dillon brother walked right up to a TMZ photog in New York this weekend and smacked the s**t out of his camera. Not cool, dude! After the sneak attack, the not-so-tough guy walked off in a huff—only to stop a few seconds later to stare down our shooter.

Dillon’s publicist told the site: “You don’t show the part of the footage where the photographer kept hassling him. He wouldn’t have pushed the camera away if he hadn’t.”

(AP Photo/Mark Lennihan)

Carey was the front-runner after Nyack’s Rosie O’Donnell made a play for the job but then backed down, supposedly because she didn’t want to relocate her family to L.A.

According to Broadcasting and Cable, the network hopes Carey will help lower the demographic of the show (which, one presumes, currently hovers somewhere between retirement age and the morgue).

This is how Carey told Letterman the deal went down:

They approached me right after the pilot for Power of 10 [a primetime game show that debuted this summer], and they called me, I said, ‘No.’ Then they called me a month later, they said, ‘What if we really’ — they called my agent: ‘What if we really go after Drew.’ “This is like a month later after I did the pilot for Power of 10 and I said, ‘Well, what does that mean?’ and he said, ‘Well, you know, I mean, maybe this kind of money.’ I go, ‘What kind of schedule?’ He said, ‘I don’t know,’ so I met with them and stuff and we’ve been negotiating ever since. Couldn’t say anything, but during your ‘Harry Potter’ bit — honestly it was like 15 minutes ago — they called me. It’s a done deal. I’m the new host of The Price Is Right.

Everyone still following?

Carey told Letterman he’s not sure when he’ll start. New episodes are set to begin taping in August.

Carey added, “My girlfriend was on the phone with a personal shopper from Bergdorf’s.�

No word on the terms of Carey’s deal, but Barker was certainly doing alright for himself. He was one of the richest personalities on television, earning $10 million a year–which means speculation will be rampant: What exactly is the price of Drew’s showroom?

(AP Photo/John Paul Filo, CBS)

Olbermann tells Kurtz his debate moderation will resemble his work co-anchoring previous election events, i.e. he’ll be fair.

I realize the far right understands that the pitchmen it turns to in lieu of newscasters could not be trusted to leave their commentary at home, and treat an actual news event as such, but fortunately I’m a journalist who does periodic commentary, and not a snake-oil salesman pretending to be an analyst or newsman.

Satisfied?

(AP Photo/Mark J. Terrill)

Dillon is getting  his for nomination for Entourage.

Tucci is getting some love for his guest turn on Monk.

And Daly is likewise being nominated for his guest-starring stint on The Sopranos (which, by the way, led the pack with 15 nods in all).

Great news for these amazing Lohud stars but,  once again, the Emmy voters seem unwilling to recognize outstanding shows without blockbuster ratings.

Where are the deserved nominations for The Wire? The critical darling has one of the most incredible ensembles and produces consistently solid TV (really, it’s more than TV, it’s event programming that tells us something about where we are as a country).

Ditto for the ensemble cast of Deadwood.

And where’s the love for Battlestar Galactica’s Edward James Olmos and Mary McDonnell–two of television’s finest actors doing some of their best work ever?

Instead we get Kiefer Sutherland’s 20th nomination for what has become a depressingly tired, and critically stale character (“Damn it, we’re out of time”).

Full list of nominations is here.

Highlights after the jump:

OUTSTANDING DRAMA
Boston Legal
Grey’s Anatomy
Heroes
House
The Sopranos

OUTSTANDING COMEDY
Entourage
The Office
30 Rock
2 1/2 Men
Ugly Betty

ACTOR – DRAMA
James Gandolfini
Hugh Laurie
Denis Leary
James Spader
Kiefer Sutherland

ACTRESS – DRAMA
Patricia Arquette
Minnie Driver
Edie Falco
Sally Field
Mariska Hargitay
Kyra Sedgwick

SUPPORTING ACTOR – DRAMA
Michael Emerson
Michael Imperioli
T.R. Knight
Masi Oka
Terry O’Quinn
William Shatner

SUPPORTING ACTRESS – DRAMA
Lorraine Bracco
Rachel Griffiths
Katherine Heigl
Sandra Oh
Aida Turturro
Chandra Wilson

ACTOR – COMEDY
Alec Baldwin
Steve Carell
Ricky Gervais
Tony Shalhoub
Charlie Sheen

ACTRESS – COMEDY
America Ferrera
Tina Fey
Felicity Huffman
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Mary Louis Parker

SUPPORTING ACTOR – COMEDY
Jon Cryer
Kevin Dillon
Neil Patrick Harris
Jeremy Piven
Rainn Wilson

SUPPORTING ACTRESS – COMEDY
Conchata Ferrell
Jenna Fischer
Elizabeth Perkins
Jaime Pressly
Holland Taylor
Vanessa Williams

WRITING – DRAMA
Battlestar Galactica • Occupation/Precipice
Lost • Through The Looking Glass
The Sopranos • Kennedy And Heidi
The Sopranos • The Second Coming
The Sopranos • Made In America

WRITING – COMEDY
30 Rock • Jack-Tor
30 Rock • Tracy Does Conan
Extras • Daniel Radcliffe
The Office • Gay Witch Hunt
The Office • The Negotiation

WRITING – VARIETY, MUSIC OR COMEDY
Late Night With Conan O’Brien
Late Show With David Letterman
Real Time With Bill Maher
The Colbert Report
The Daily Show With John Stewart

(AP Photo/Chris Pizzello) 

Katonah resident Marc Black penned the comical diddy lampooning Martha Stewart’s attempt to trademark the name Katonah for a line of Home Design products at the request of his neighbors, who have been fighting the domestic diva’s plans.

“In the beginning when they asked me to write it, the idea was to have fun and I just hoped to raise peoples’ spirits a bit,” the songwriter told the Journal News. “Music very often grows out of a problem, as all art does, so now I’m kind of interested in knowing if it can have an effect.”

The surprisingly hummable song is currently on YouTube and Black says he’ll perform it live this Saturday at the Towne Crier Cafe in Pawling.

A few sample lyrics:

And while we were sleeping

And the chief was crying

Somebody snuck in

And I ain’t lying (and she’s got lawyers).

She’s the personification of gracious living

Capacious gal from New York City.

She sells in the north and she sell in the south

Cookies made to melt in your mouth.

She could be a good pal.

In the summer of love she became a stockbroker.

While I was getting high, she was learning poker.

She’ll cater to you

She’ll cater to me

Cater to KMart, woo-eee.

Welcome to the neighborhood.

More lyrics after the break.

She might be an angel in disguise.

A guru who is all wise.

None of us really know her plan.

We love you, Martha.

And that’s why

I wrote this song’ah

We like you here

You can belong’ah.

But you just can’t buy us

And simply own us.

Somebody should have told you it’s very wrong’ah

To take our name and try to become Chef Katonah.

Check out a private performance here. And the full Youtube video here.

Photos: Carucha L. Meuse/ The Journal News, AP Photo/Stephen Chernin