Actress Kate Mara has it all: Stunning natural beauty. Legitimate movie career (“Shooter,” the underrated “We Are Marshall” and the upcoming “Transsiberian,” for examps). And, of course, a Lower Hudson Valley pedigree as a Bedford native and Fox Lane High School grad.
So I’m hoping she can use her high-profile powers of persuasion to convince her uncle, New York Giants CEO John Mara, to nix the one-time fees that he’s subjected to season-ticket holders to ensure they have the chance to buy seats at the new stadium.
When I first heard about this, I thought, “Well, how bad could it really be per seat? $50? $100?” Try a minimum of $1,000. (Yeah, with a comma and everything.) The maximum fee? Twenty large.
And yes, those are the fees to pay before buying actual tickets, whose cost I’ve heard has been estimated at 32.9 bajillion dollars, give or take a few kajillion.
Now, although I’ve always been a fan of Big Blue, I’ve only been to two or three games at the Meadowlands, so it’s not like I have anything to gain by the removal of the fees attached these so-called “personal seat licenses,” a.k.a. muggings with totally arbitrary monetary values. It’s just common sense not to burn the ticket-holders that endured the Ray Handley era.
If Kate Mara’s mere asking doesn’t change her uncle’s mind, perhaps she could record a convincing public service announcement. On a minimalist set, while half-sitting on a stool, she could look mournfully into the camera and pitch the following:
Uncle John, please revoke the personal seat licenses. I’m a well-behaved actress in Hollywood, but if you don’t change your ways, your niece might just become the next Lindsay Lohan. (Cue the sparkly “The More You Know” rainbow.)
If that doesn’t change his mind, nothing will.
But say Johnny doesn’t budge. I do have a Plan B.
I’m not sure how much Ms. Mara makes per picture, but if her steadily improving career means she’s approaching seven figures per movie, and she donates the money she makes from one flick to her uncle in lieu of the season-ticket holders’ fees, I would be magnanimous enough to go on a date with her. It’s a sacrifice I think I could make for all of us Giants fans.
All of you, including Kate, can thank me later.
(AP Photo/Evan Agostini)