Rosie O’Donnell’s new career: Kindergarten arts and crafts instructor

It was an interesting morning for Rosie O’Donnell on GMA. First, in an interview with Diane Sawyer, she says she’d like to take Britney Spears’s place as the celebrity posterchild for mental illness. 112655_2844_pre.jpg

“I sort of feel Britney has become the poster child (for mental illness). The kid is very young. She never had a childhood. She never rode a Big Wheel. Rather than put her face on mental illness, or Brooke Shields, who had postpartum depression, use me.”

The South Nyacker also confirmed that she’s given up beer. But not because she had any problems with alcohol abuse. Just because she wanted to lose a few pounds. “I’m not by any means sober,” she said. “Beer to me, I love it and I drink it like it’s water.”

Then, later in the morning, she showed off what she’s been up to (other than blogging, vlogging, and going on tour with Cyndi Lauper). You guessed it: writing a book. But it was no ordinary book. It’s an arts-and-crafts project book called “Crafty U,” in which she gives examples of how you too can entertain your child with a ball of yarn, some glue, and a balloon. At least, that’s how she says she’s able to occupy her kids minds since she forbids them from watching TV.

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In the best moment of the appearance, after doing an on-stage demo of how to make a bowl out glue-hardened string, she said the creation could double as a hat. Especially for Robin Roberts, O’Donnell added, who has a beautiful bald head. At which point Roberts promptly, bravely whipped off her wig and tossed the string hat atop her noggin.

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Now, not to complain or anything, but if Rosie really wanted to take Britney’s place, shouldn’t she have been the one shedding her hair?

Video of Roberts losing her wig

“Rosie shares her views of politics, wealth, fame” [GMA]

(Photos: ABC/Ida Mae Astute)

Denzel Washington tabbed for next movie based on book by ‘Bourne’ novelist

denzel.jpgMount Vernon-raised Denzel Washington has been tabbed to play the lead in “The Matarese Circle,” which looks to be the next movie based on a novel by “The Bourne Identity” novelist Robert Ludlum.

According to an April 3 article by The Hollywood Reporter, the movie “revolves around two secret agents — an American and a Russian — who must work together to fight a mysterious group of killers known as the Matarese. The twist: The agents, Bradley Scofield and Vasili Taleniekov, have been nemeses for years, with each responsible for killing someone close to the other. According to those familiar with the pitch, Washington would play Scofield.”

Which is a shame, because I’d love to hear Washington do an entire movie with a Russian accent. And I have no reason to believe the two-time Oscar-winner wouldn’t be able to pull it off convincingly, either.

(AP Photo/Louis Lanzano)

So much for Scarsdale; Beyonce & Jay-Z get hitched in TriBeCa

Hard evidence is hard to come by, but the rumor mill is churning at full tilt with the news that Beyonce and Jay-Z got married last night, Friday, April 4, at Z’s downtown NYC apartment. People Mag reports, “Though there is no official confirmation, [a] friend says, ‘It happened earlier this evening. Jay wanted it to be a really private affair – close friends and family.'”

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People, of course, was the same source for the news that the couple got their marriage license in Scarsdale, of all places, on Tuesday, setting off a week’s worth of rabid speculation. And, I’ll admit it, even getting me to submit a FOIL request to the Scarsdale Village Clerk to see a copy of the marriage license for one Shawn Corey Carter (aka Jay-Z).

Since they have five days to respond, I never did get confirmation (or a copy of the document) during the work week. ap_david_stern_070724_mn.jpgBut, like so many celebrity-enamored suburbanites, I was hoping that maybe the Scarsdale story would be (a) not an April fool’s prank and (b) evidence that the wedding was taking place here in Westchester. My favorite theory, courtesy of Gothamist, was that the wedding was taking place at NBA commissioner David Stern’s Scarsdale home.

Or not.

Turns out the festivities took place in that slightly larger city to the south. A media storm descended on Jay-Z’s TriBeCa apartment yesterday, around the same time that candelabras and flowers started arriving. In addition to every media outlet in the known universe, the invited guests apparently included: Beyonce’s mother Tina Knowles, her father and manager Mathew, her sister Solange, Destiny’s Child members Kelly Rowland and Michelle Williams, and friend Gwyneth Paltrow (pictured here arriving at Jay-Z’s apartment building).

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Another source told People that the post-wedding party was Thai themed, and that Amy’s Orchids was hired to provide 50,000 to 60,000 white orchid blooms.

And hey, if that’s not enough evidence to convince you that Zeyonce tied the knot, check out Beyonce’s Wikipedia page, in which her name has already been updated. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Beyoncé Giselle Knowles-Carter.

UPDATE: The “Carter” has since been dropped from the Wikipedia page.

(AP Photos)

Woodruff wins a Peabody

Rye’s Bob Woodruff is set to recieve a Peabody for his series of segments, “Wounds of War — The Long Road Home for Our Nation’s Veterans,” tjndc5-5eg6e39nlhfm105s41r_layout.jpgwhich he reported for ABC after returning to the airwaves almost exactly one year ago.

He’ll be honored along with Kimberly Dozier, a correspondent for CBS who, like Woodruff, almost lost her life while on assignment in Iraq.

Speaking of Woodruff, in case you didn’t catch it, be sure to check out Heather Salerno’s outstanding story on Woodruff one-year anniversary, after returning to the air, be sure to check it out here.

“Woodruff, Dozier Get Peabody Awards” [AP]

(Mark Vergari / InTown Westchester)

Hova matrimony? Jay-Z and Beyoncé reportedly nab marriage license in Scarsdale

jayzbeyonce.jpgAre “Crazy In Love” power couple Jay-Z (born Shawn Carter) and Beyoncé Knowles heading toward the bonds of H-to-the-izzo, L-to-the-izzy matrimony?

The news broke on April Fool’s Day, so take it with a grain of salt (for now), but People magazine nonetheless reported that the duo secured a marriage license in Scarsdale yesterday morning. The document’s valid for 60 days, which is roughly equivalent to the number of days Jay-Z was “retired” from the music industry.

The mag couldn’t land a comment from the couple’s spokespeople, which probably means the scoop is either dead-on or way off.

Notes People:

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Beyoncé, 26, and Jay-Z, 38, have been dating since 2002, though the couple have stood reluctant to discuss their relationship publicly.

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So why start now?

(AP Photo/Alan Diaz)

Podcast: April 2

On tap this week: the do-goodery of Palisades native Hayden Panettiere and Pound Ridge activist Richard Gere.

<a href=”http://www.lohud.com/assets/mov/040108_suburbarazzi_lohud.mp4″ title=”Anarchy Media Player – Right click to download file” class=”noimg”><em>Podcast file:</em></a>

<a href=”http://www.lohud.com/assets/mov/040108_suburbarazzi_lohud.flv” title=”Anarchy Media Player – Right click to download file”><em>Download:</em></a>

Here’s this week’s quiz:

The rumor mill is churning again about who Chappaqua resident Vanessa Williams is reportedly dating. Which celeb has she been linked to this time?

A. Ludacris
B. Justin Timberlake
C. Tyler Perry
D. John Legend

Personally, I thought that was way hard — assuming, of course, you aren’t already caught up to date with your Suburbarazzi blog reading. Stacy-Ann, however, got it without even having to think about it. Her correct answer is at the end of the clip and, as always, after the break.

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Hayden Panettiere wins award, weeps for the dolphins (again)

She may be a badass, indestructible super-cheerleader, but it’s clear that “Heroes” star does have one form of kryptonite: the dolphins and whales of Japan. Nothing else, it seems, can bring her to tears quite so fast. First she cried months ago, while partaking in an attempt to stop Japanese fisherman from slaughtering the innocents; then, this last Saturday, she cried again when she was honored at the Humane Society’s Genesis Awards, as a celebrity who brings attention to animal causes.

Panettiere, who grew up in Palisades, receieved the Gretchen Wyler Award, and she attended the event with her parents and boyfriend, “Heroes” castmate Milo Ventimiglia. Among the things she said to the audience of animal lovers, amidst the tears:

“As an actress, you always dream of getting awards like the Golden Globe award, but I never expected to get an award that is this special and important to me as this. There are people who dedicate their entire lives to preserving the environment and defending animals, they are so much more deserving of something like this.”

According to People, after breaking down at the podium, she made a beeline to the bathroom to regain her composure, and then was escorted back to her seat by Ventimiglia.

(AP Photos/Susan Walsh)