And the Lord said, let there be a Baldwin-Lohan Religious Detox Center

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At first the pairing of Stephen Baldwin and Michael Lohan seemed just harmless and goofy. But now the fearless team of evangelical eccentrics has itself a mission: to build a $15 million alcohol and drug treatment center in Southampton, Long Island. According to the NY Post, they’re planning to build it on 10 acres owned by Donald Havrilla, the pastor of the town’s Full Gospel Church — and, oddly, the only person outside Uzbekistan who hasn’t heard of Lindsay Lohan (Michael’s daughter) or her DWIs or her own numerous failed attempts at rehab.

The strangest part of this whole story: Michael is actually still undergoing treatment himself at a separate facility in West Babylon. Which, when you think about it, has to make you smile. At last, Stephen Baldwin has finally found a family more screwed up than his own.

“Papa Do Preach” [NY Post]

(Lohan: AP Photo/ Dick Yarwood; Baldwin: Gwynne Johnson / Rockland Magazine)

Ted Mann

Ted Mann aspires to join Stephen Baldwin’s Breakthrough Ministry, more commonly known as “skateboarding for the savior." Before becoming a Senior Editor at InTown, he worked at The Atlantic Monthly, the Philadelphia City Paper, and the University of Pennsylvania Press. His writing has also appeared in The New York Times, The New York Press, and The Pennsylvania Gazette.