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Stalking Lower Hudson Valley Celebrities … So You Don\’t Have To

We should all be so lucky to carry Naomi Campbell’s purse

March
21

The supermodel has taken a lot of heat lately from the press (especially the NY Post) for throwing phones at her maids and assistants (allegedly as many as four times at four different people) and most recently for handing off her bag to a sanitation worker to hold as she sauntered in to her court-mandated community service yesterday. But really, shouldn’t we cut her some slack? Yes, I know, she makes an easy target: A supermodel, with an apparent hyper sense of entitlement, who’s cruel to her hired help! Okay, I get it. But really who’s to blame in all this? Naomi Campbell for throwing phones or the assistants and maids who insist on filling out police reports?

She’s Naomi Campbell. La Campbell! If Naomi wants to throw a phone every once in a while, the lady has a right to throw a phone. Next time, a mobile device from Campbell hits you, just say, “Sorry Ms. Campbell. I got in the way of your phone. I’ll get this repaired as soon as I go to the ER to get stitches for this gushing wound.” Is that so hard?

Why must the police get involved? I throw things all the time at our magazine’s tireless copy editor, Jimmy. Does Jimmy complain? Does he call the police? No. And that should be a lesson to people in the vicinity of Naomi Campbell: Zip it!

And, so what if she didn’t want to carry her own bag? Why should she? She’s a model. She’s got dignity—she’s pretty AND can walk in a straight line. Why shouldn’t she make a man who’s spent 24 years of his life serving the people of New York as a police officer for the Sanitation department carry her Louis Vuitton. I bet he’s never even walked a runway before. And, while we’re at it…of COURSE he should have walked five paces behind her. You do not walk side by side with La Campbell! It’s just not done.

My only regret, is that we live in a society with such a regressive legal system. Here’s what the court should have done: Find her guilty, fine, but allow her to have her maids and assistants do her community service for her. After all, who really wins in all this? The Sanitation Department? The People of New York? The maid who needed stitches (and a new job)? Humanity? Fashion?

No. None of the above. I’ll tell you who wins…Naomi! Why does Naomi win? Because Naomi always wins. That’s just the way things are.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 21st, 2007 at 8:42 am by Suburbarazzi.
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The suburbs are full of A-list (and plenty of B-, C-, and D-list) celebrities. Consider this a loving tribute to the beautiful, the wealthy, the talented, and the Baldwin of the Lower Hudson Valley.

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