The Surreal Life 4: Al Pacino to play Salvador Dali

tjndc5-5bw891wzmj483plq9tb_layout.jpgAccording to Variety, Pacino will play the artist in “Dali & I: The Surreal Story,” directed by Andrew Niccol (who also did the less than memorable Pacino pic, “Simone”). The film will tackle Dali’s later years, when he got really wacky with those melting clocks and dismembered body parts.

It’s an exciting premise and, might I add, this has to be one of the greatest casting moves in recent movie history (only Meryl Streep in “The Devil Wears Prada” comes close). Besides the fact that Al, a Sneden’s Landing resident, can surely pull off Dali’s haughty expression and upturned waxed mustache like a pro, these have to be two of the most quotable people in the arts. Some of my favorites:

Dali: What is an elegant woman? An elegant woman is a woman who despises you and who has no hair under her arms.

Pacino (“Scarface”): All I have in this world is my balls and my word, and I don’t break ’em for no-one you understand?

Dali: I do not take drugs. I am drugs.

Pacino (“Godfather 2”): I don’t feel like I have to kill everybody Tom, just my enemies. That’s all.

Dali: Every morning upon awakening, I experience a supreme pleasure: that of being Salvador Dalí, and I ask myself, wonderstruck, what prodigious thing will he do today, this Salvador Dalí.

You just gotta love anyone that refers to themself in the third person.

Pacino to play artist Dali [Variety]

(AP Photo/Domenico Stinellis)

Boy oh boy, does Aaron Sorkin sure hate us bloggers

tjndc5-5c4wzp5ziw511kr2vg59_layout.jpgIn his latest defense of “Studio 60” the Scarsdale native complained to journalists that blogs and message boards have unfairly attacked his show. And furthermore, he asserts, if they aren’t credentialed, why listen? He continues:
<blockquote><div>

“I do believe we’ve seen an enormous rise of amateurism. The thing I find troubling about the Internet, as great a resource tool as it is, great for communications as it is, and that everybody has a voice — the thing is, everybody’s voice oughtn’t be equal.” </div></blockquote>

Ouch! If you’d prefer to get slaughtered by old fashioned newspapers, like the Star Ledger, which had the story this quote was pulled from — or the LA Times, with their “Comedy Writers Aren’t Laughing About ‘Studio 60′” article from earlier this month — fine by me. And hey, if it’s any consolation, I promise to put Paul Haggis’s new show, “The Black Donnellys,” under the microscope, too — when it takes over your time slot this March.

Sorkin defends ‘Studio 60’ [Star Ledger]

(Tom Nycz/The Journal News)

No Oscar nods … but plenty of Razzies!

By now you know that our Lower Hudson Valley celebrities struck out in the Academy Awards nomination sweepstakes. Despite our last ditch appeals for people like Stanley Tucci (I still say he would’ve been a good pick for supporting actor in “Prada”), the only nominations with any connection to the area are: “The Departed,” which shot some scenes in White Plains (anyone know which ones?), and “Babel,” co-produced by New City native Steve Golin.

But that doesn’t mean we’re going home empty handed this awards season. Our region is up for more than its fair share of Razzies (the awards honoring the worst of the worst in motion pictures), including many of the performances I plugged earlier this week:

Worst Picture:

“Lady In The Water” (starring Bryce Dallas Howard, who graduated from Byram Hills High School in Armonk)

“Wicker Man” (starring Nyack resident Ellen Burstyn)

Worst Remake or Rip-Off:

“Poseidon” (starring Mamaroneck’s Kevin Dillon)

“Wicker Man” (Burstyn, again)

Worst Prequel or Sequel:

“Garfield 2: A Tail Of Two Kitties” (Why oh why would Sneden’s Landing’s Bill Murray get suckered into voicing the cat — again?)

Worst Director:

Ron Howard, “The Da Vinci Code” (lives in Greenwich)

The Full List of Razzie Nominations [Little Bits of News]

Nerds everywhere riot as YouTube yanks possible new ‘Ghostbusters’ video game footage

OK, Suburbarazzi fans, I have a confession to make: “Ghostbusters” might be my favorite movie of all time. (“The Godfather,” eat your heart out.)

So when I viewed some leaked footage of what might or might not be a brand-spankin’ new video game based on Walter Peck’s sworn enemies, I was more excited than Slimer in a banquet hall. Only Dr. Peter Venkman (played by Sneden’s Landing resident Bill Murray) would have been able to reel me in with a proton beam, while shouting “Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh! Nice shootin’, Tex!” to Dr. Ray Stantz.

Sadly, in true Gozerian fashion, the video game footage has since been yanked off YouTube, so I can’t even link to it here anymore. In its place, however, I’ll refer you to a relatively disappointing but mildly amusing ending of the “Ghostbusters” game produced two decades ago for the original Nintendo Entertainment System. You gotta love the weak attempts at translation and humility:

<blockquote><div>CONGLATURATION (sic) !!! YOU HAVE COMPLETED A GREAT GAME. AND PROOVED (sic) THE JUSTICE OF OUR CULTURE. NOW GO AND REST OUR HEROES !</div></blockquote>

(Associated Press file photo by Lionel Cironneau)

‘Filliam H. Muffman’ afraid to go on ‘Colbert’

tjndc5-5d3kgx4asqwnvng8335_layout.jpgThe Desperate Housewives star (who was born in Bedford)  recently published a book called “A Practical Handbook for the Boyfriendâ€? and gave an interview to USA Today this morning telling the paper, “I love Stephen Colbert, but I’m scared to go near him.”

She also said her husband, William H. Macy, asked her to take stuff out of her book. “He thought some of the sexual overtones were too shocking.�

In other Felicity Huffman news, it was recently announced the actress will star in the film version of the British TV show, “A Politician’s Wife� about a woman who discovers that her husband, a member of the British Parliament, is having an affair with a former prostitute.

The film will hit theaters in 2008.

(AP Photo/Mark J. Terrill)

Rosie baits Oprah the old fashioned way: nasty blog haikus

rosie-oprah.jpg
It’s been, what, a whole week since Rosie O started another celebrity feud? Now she’s ratcheting up the stakes, taking on the one person you don’t want to pick a fight with: Oprah. (Trust me, just ask Dave Letterman.)

On her r blog, Rosie lashed out at Oprah for her interview last week with kidnap victim Shawn Hornbeck and his family. As with many of her previous spats, she phrased her criticism in the form of a nonsensical, stream-of-consciousness semi-haikus (it doesn’t all follow the 5-7-5 format, but sort of aspires to). Here’s one snippet:

<blockquote><div>

after 4 years captive
a new haircut couldn’t hide
his tormented eyes
</div></blockquote>She concludes by saying that at least the other kidnapped boy, Ben Ownby, did not appear on the Oprah show and thus was not exploited by the Harpo machine: “a moment of sanity.”

Could this set up an eventual James Frey-ish smackdown for the portly Lower Nyack resident? Will this be the final straw for Barbara Walters, sick of O’Donnell’s nonstop stream of celebrity feuds? Or will it be Rosie’s insolence on The View, openly defying Mama Walters on the show and suggesting that Bush should be impeached, and then opening up the whole Clinton impeachment can of worms? All I know for sure is that if she’s this controversial on daytime TV, her “Nip/Tuck” spinoff show is sure to be off the hook.

Rosie’s Anti-Oprah Ramblings [r blog]

(Rosie: AP Photo/Mary Altaffer; Oprah: AP Photo/Paul Hawthorne)

Shock! Susan Sarandon is NOT a fan of George W. Bush

tjndc5-5d7pyykmyz41mpylm9vn_layout.jpgApparently the President’s State of the Union address did not sway the well-known anti-war actress from Bedford. Sarandon said she was “bored� by Bush.

tjndc5-5d80vp94tz7uym1x5xe_layout.jpg“He didn’t talk to me about anything new,” she told Reuters yesterday.

Sarandon was in Washington with several lawmakers trying to drum up support for legislation to withdraw U.S. forces from Iraq within six months. And the people she’s most trying to reach out to are the likely 2008 presidential candidates.

“We’re hoping to ask all the candidates in the future, everyone that’s hoping to run, to really make this part of their campaigns,” Sarandon told the news agency.
This weekend, she will be joined by her partner Tim Robbins, and fellow anti-war actor Sean Penn at a protest in D.C.

(AP Photos by Charles Dharapak and Susan Walsh)

Matisyahu goes to Sundance

The White Plains-bred reggae star performed Sunday night at the the Riverhouse Café in Park City. According to New York Observer gossip hound, Morgan Spencer, the Hasidic singer “scored big with two models in the front, bringing them to tears.�
<blockquote><div>“I don’t know if they were fans or drunk or really moved, which is what it looked like. They were being really dramatic,� said an onlooker. “During the acoustic Jerusalem song, they were kissing their fingers and putting up peace signs.�</div></blockquote>
According to Morgan, Matisyahu also showed up at “the Heineken party� later that night, where guests included Bijou Phillips, Tara Reid, Paul Rudd, and Ron Burkle.

Wonder what the rabbis back in Crown Heights will say about that?

tjndc5-5ctkmc3xtbq1crbx3gwm_layout.jpg

Just like 17 years ago, Ivana Trump’s done with The Donald’s fighting

Echoing the sentiment of pretty much everyone else in this country, Ivana Trump was tracked down in France to tell the Associated Press she’s fed up with the feud between ex-husband Donald Trump and “The View” co-host Rosie O’Donnell.

The throw-down between The Donald, sometimes of Bedford, and Ro, far more frequently of Nyack, was mostly a publicity stunt, Ivana said.

<blockquote><div>Donald and Rosie, they’re getting fantastic ratings, they’re getting publicity, they’re really using it as a marketing tool, not because they are enemies, and I understand that only too well.</div></blockquote>

According to the same AP story, Mr. Trump and Ms. O’Donnell were invited to call a truce — in Ivana Trump’s National Enquirer and Globe advice column. Sounds like Donald and Rosie aren’t the only ones using the media for publicity.

(Associated Press file photo by Tina Fineberg)

Rosie O’Donnell, Justin Chambers—There’s a lot of star-wattage at the Palisades Center

tjndc5-5cbaiutpkvoorb2943l_layout.jpgYesterday on The View, Rosie interviewed fellow Rocklander Justin Chambers, one of the stars of Grey’s Anatomy.

When Rosie invited him to bring his five children over to her place so their kids could play music together, he said:

“I think we go to the same mall…in Rockland�

Rosie responded: “Really? Fantastic. I’ll meet you by Chilis. Right by the movie theater.�

We knew Justin Chambers used to live in Tappan, but last we heard he had moved out to L.A. when Grey’s started. Is he back? Or did he never really leave?
(AP Photo of Justin and his wife/Danny Moloshok)

David Letterman’s staff releases ‘Top 10 Signs Donald Trump Hates You’

Some personal favorites from the North Salem resident’s Jan. 11 Top 10 list that jokes about the part-time Bedford dweller:

9. Pet hamster is missing and Donald’s got a new hair style

5. Buys all the pie in the world just so you can never have pie again

1. You’re one of the hosts of “The View”

If you’re more against Nyack resident Rosie O’Donnell in this feud that won’t quite die, you might laugh more at this Suburbarazzi post about Letterman’s Top 10.

(Associated Press file photo by Henny Ray Abrams)

Stephen Baldwin + NYC Trash cans = a marketing match made in heaven

We know marketing is a tricky game — sending the right message about the product your hawking takes a complicated mix of science and art. And apparently the brains responsible for getting the word out about Stephen Baldwin’s new book decided the best way to do that is by appealing to people tossing their trash in New York City. If there is a marketing equivalent of the Academy Awards, they deserve the top prize!

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(Photo by Robert Zeliger)